Published Sunday, January 13, 2013

'Spirited toothpaste' a new development

I like the unusual. Through many years of writing, I have been more attracted to that which is outside the boundaries of the usual, routine and ordinary happenings of life.

For one thing, it is more amusing, like for example, in this new intoxicating idea: “Liquor-flavored toothpaste.”

There is no indication of what proof it is.

However, it was suggested that even in cases where the dentist had difficulty persuading some stubborn patients to at least brush once a day, when this particular dentifrice was used, some brushed their teeth three and four times a day.

There was some question as to whether the patients simply got into the spirit of brushing their teeth or “the spirit got into them.”

I can imagine that with the continued use of this toothpaste, it might be possible for the user to get pink toothbrush and a red nose at the same time.

The advertisement could go like this: “The toothpaste for all who want whiter teeth and stronger breath.”

In the matter of stronger breath, that could be a problem.

Picture this scene: A husband comes in from work, kisses his wife, and she gets a whiff of his breath.

“Tell me the truth!” she demands, “did you meet some of the boys at that place where I told you to never go again?”

“No,” he says, “of course not -- I didn’t go anywhere. I came straight home. All I did was brush my teeth.”

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