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John Winters Columnist

Published Sunday, August 05, 2012

Column: Don't blame Oreo cookies or the chicken sandwich at Chick-fil-A

There is an art to eating an Oreo cookie.

It does not involve dunking in milk, nor twisting it apart and scraping off the cream filling first. That is reserved for amateurs.

A while back I was enlightening the SONS of Thunder on the intricacies of the correct method of enjoying one of my favorite treats when said cookie popped up on the television.

It was about a new campaign cooked up by the cookie maker’s advertising department. I glanced up and saw an Oreo stacked with six different creme colors within the chocolate cookie. I figured it was some new “The Whole World Loves Oreos” push.

Apparently not. No, the fine folks decided to show their support of Gay Pride Week and hence, the new multi-colored cookie.

Cue the traditional family values groups calling for boycotts and saying America is turning into Sodom and Gomorrah. Cue the liberal groups praising Oreo for their forward-thinking and enlightened views.

Fast forward. Recently in an interview with Baptist Press, Chick-fil-A president Dan Cathy said the company was “guilty as charged” for supporting the “biblical definition of a family.”

Cue the liberal groups calling for boycotts and saying Chick-fil-A was unenlightened and should not exist in modern America. Cue the traditional family values groups applauding the restaurant chain for upholding traditional marriage and standing by their beliefs.

The Jim Henson company, which had a toy deal with Chick-fil-A, pulled its toys from the franchise. Now whether Henson pulled its toys before Chick-fil-A pulled them over a safety issue is in dispute. But this fact is not: Kermit and Miss Piggy will not have a date night with chicken sandwiches and waffle fries.

I grow weary of corporations pushing the limits in advertising campaigns and executives pronouncements to show they are mainstream, enlightened and forward-thinking. Why not just admit it’s a numbers game? If more customers favor your latest shock campaign than don’t, you win.

I’d like to see some company actually stand behind what they say they believe. And by that, I mean the bottom line - profits. To be willing to lose money because of a belief. Let’s take Chick-fil-A for example. They are adamant they support family and biblical values. If so, why doesn’t the company follow biblical commands, like honoring the Sabbath. What chicken company would close on Sunday?

Oh, wait.

And yes, I know we can argue till eternity about what day is the “Sabbath.” That’s not the point.

Leaving out one’s view of our moral situation, our country is in free fall. We are so far in debt we have to borrow zeros to add to the amount; our healthcare system is broken and many can’t afford it; record numbers are losing their jobs, their dreams and their homes; American soldiers are dying every day in far off lands; unemployment is off the charts.

How does this food fight compare?

Does my eating an Oreo cookie mean I support the company’s stance on gay rights/marriage? No. Does my eating a Chick-fil-A sandwich (no pickle) mean I’m against gay rights/marriage? No.

It’s a cookie. It’s a chicken sandwich. I like both. I refuse to believe an Oreo cookie or a Chick-fil-A chicken sandwich looks at color or sexual orientation.

There is an old adage that actions speak louder than words. Those ranting against Chick-fil-A focus on the words; forgetting the company has followed the same beliefs for more than 40 years. I have yet to see a Gaydar in any Chick-fil-A. And employees say thank you to everyone.

If it really is such a big deal, how about just not eating there? At the boycott rate we’re going, no one on any side of any issue is going to have anything to eat pretty soon.

For me, I’m going to grab a Chick-fil-A sandwich (no pickles) eat it, followed by the proper way of eating an Oreo cookie. And I’m going to do both of those while watching a Muppets movie - knowing full well Miss Piggy and Kermit’s relationship is frowned upon in certain circles.

And for those who just must know, here’s the link: http://justflipthedog.com/2010/10/the-real-mans-guide-to-eating-an-oreo/

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