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Alex McRae Columnist

Published Thursday, October 29, 2009

Easy rider

Stories like this turn me absolutely green with envy.

It's probably a guy thing. Most men couldn't fix a dead car engine if their lives depended on it. And most would give anything if they could. I'm one of them.

I come by my ignorance of internal combustion honestly. When I was a kid, my dad never worked on the family car, and neither did I. Some of my pals had the opposite experience.

While my skills topped out at checking the oil or filling the tank, they were building hot rods and going racing. Most never stopped.

Working on engines is one of those skills that never goes out of style. As long as people rely on motors to run cars, trucks, airplanes or snowmobiles, people who are good under the hood will have a useful -- and profitable -- skill.

Best of all, guys who know their engines can create motorized thrills the rest of us mortals can only admire and say, "Dude, way to go."

One such highly-skilled person is Dennis LeRoy Anderson of Proctor, Minn. Anderson has been working on engines most of his 62 years. Friends and neighbors say there isn't much he can't do.

And Anderson's mechanical talents aren't limited to automobile engines. He's also a whiz at creative use of lawn mower engines, as he proved not long ago.

Many people have riding lawn mowers. Most of us use them to keep the lawn clipped. Anderson used his lawn mower engine to power a motorized lounge chair that just made headlines after Anderson was busted for bashing his Barcalounger into a conventional vehicle while on his way home from a local bar. No one was surprised to hear alcohol was involved.

Anderson received a DUI for his efforts. And that's nothing to brag about. Even manly men frown on drunk driving, but just building the ride was a spectacular achievement.

This was no piece of junk. Anderson's chair was a scream machine that came equipped with black and blue leather upholstery, a stereo, a footrest, cupholders, headlights, a nitrous oxide power boost system, a drag racing-style steering wheel and -- drum roll, please -- a parachute.

Cops said when it wasn't parked in front of the big screen TV, the chair was capable of speeds nearing 20 miles per hour. Anderson's rolling chair was a common sight on local streets, but he generally drove during the day. And stone sober.

Anderson said he was doing fine the night of the wreck, until a girl jumped in the chair with him and caused him to lose control of the vehicle.

I can believe that. A used Pinto won't draw chicks, but you show up in a rolling La-Z-Boy complete with stereo and a parachute and you'd better buckle up, buddy, 'cause female company's gonna be coming.

This was Anderson's first bust for driving a chair while intoxicated. It will be his last. At least in this particular chair.

Minnesota state law says vehicles seized in a drunk driving case can be kept by the cops and used for official business or sold to raise cash. Anderson's chair is going up for sale soon and you can bet the boys will be lined up for a shot at this ride.

It's not only cheaper than a muscle car, but as chick magnets go, if this doesn't work, nothing will.

(send your e-mail comments to: alex@newnan.com )

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