[var rssXML]
The Times-Herald View Today's Print Edition

Jim Griffith

Blogs

Angela McRae

Tea with friends

Deberah Williams

Everyday Finesse

Lorrie Lynch

Who's News

USA Weekend Tween Tribune - News For Tweens
Click Here

Jim Griffith Columnist

Published Friday, August 17, 2012

Doesn't take much for an excuse

Now that school has started once again, parents will have to tune up their skills at writing excuses for their children.

When a child misses school for one or more days, parents are required in most school districts to send a written excuse as an explanation for the student’s absence from school.

Although probably not intended to be amusing by the parent, the excuses are often hilarious, as is true of the following samples:

“Johnny was absent yesterday because of a sore trout.”

One could not blame the teacher for suspecting that there was something “fishy” about this excuse.

“Please excuse Freddie for being out yesterday because he had the ‘fuel.’”

Two other excuses are on the drastic side, to the say the least:

“Please excuse Janie for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.”

“My son is under a doctor’s care and should not take ‘fiscal’ education. Please excuse him.”

We smile at these excuses for children, but we must admit that adults are past masters at excusing themselves.

I read somewhere that the annual convention of the Hypochondriac Society was held last month, but all the members phoned in excuses and said they were too sick to attend.

It was the same story with the Procrastinators Convention.

They wanted to get together for a meeting, but couldn’t get around to it.

But the fact remains: “Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: “It might have been.”

Comment On This Story

Times-Herald.com does not necessarily agree with the comments posted below. Responsibility of comments rests solely with the writer. Comments posted in ALL CAPS will be deleted.

Submission of a comment does not guarantee publication. Comments will be posted by a moderator after being scanned for abusive language, relevance, etc. See our Comments FAQ for more details.

Most Popular

  • Viewed
  • Emailed
  • Commented
  1. Thursday NAACP meeting cancelled; group meets tonight
  2. Ga. given 30 days to fix food stamp problems
  3. Habitat for Humanity hampered by gunfire, crime
  4. 10 Things to Know for Today
  5. Freeze Warning, gusty winds for Middle Georgia
  6. Governor signs sweeping tax-break law
  7. Northgate pulls off important sweep of Starr’s Mill
  8. Two-vehicle accident slows One Lane of Bullsboro Drive
  9. Obituary: Mr. Harold L. “Hal” Kidd Jr., 75, of Carrollton, Georgia, died Sunday, April 13, 2014. He was born in Newnan, Georgia, on June 2, 1938. His parents, Harold L. Kidd Sr. and Eunice Newman Kidd preceded him in death. In addition to his parents a brother Donald, age 15, preceded him in death. At age 18 Hal joined the National Guard reserve and served for 4 years. He began his accounting career at a local accounting firm in 1964. In 1968 he received his bachelor of business of administration in accounting from Georgia State College and worked as a certified public accountant. In 1975 he built a poultry farm and operated it for seven years. He received an award of commendation for outstanding hatching egg producer of Gold Kist in 1980. He was happiest on his motorcycles and flying as a private pilot. He served as secretary/treasurer of the Carrollton Lions Club. Hal also served as treasurer of the Carroll County Livestock Sale Barn, the Carroll County Baptist Association, and the West Georgia Two Cylinder Club. He was a member of Oak Grove Baptist Church where he served in various capacities. Hal retired from Warren Sewell Clothing Company of Bremen, Georgia in 2002 after 21 years. Survivors include his wife of 55 years, Sara Stipe Kidd; three children, Patricia K. Thomas of Acworth, Georgia, Julie Mohs and husband Geoff of Douglasville, Georgia, and John C. Kidd of Raleigh, North Carolina; grandchildren, Dean Phillips and wife Elizabeth, Jennifer Phillips, all of Acworth, Georgia, Jarrett Mohs of Douglasville, Georgia; one great grandson, Parker Evanoff of Acworth, Georgia; brother, Joe W. Kidd of Gainesville, Georgia; and a number of nieces and nephews. The family will receive friends at Almon Funeral Home on Wednesday evening from 6 until 8 p.m. Funeral service will be Thursday, April 17, at 11 a.m. at the chapel of Almon Funeral Home with Pastor Rob Vincent of Oak Grove Baptist Church officiating. Pallbearers will be Rod Stipe, Chuck Adams, Clifton Stephens, Geoff Mohs, Bob Mayer and Jason Kidd. Interment will be in Stripling Chapel Church Cemetery. Memorial contributions can be made to Oak Grove Baptist Church, 2829 Oak Grove Church Rd., Carrollton, GA 30117. Messages of condolences may be expressed to the family online at www.almonfuneralhome.com . Almon Funeral Home of Carrollton has charge of arrangements.
  10. Obituary: Mr. Robert Franklin Moore Mr. Robert Franklin Moore, age 78, of Griffin, GA, passed away on Monday, April 14, 2014, at Piedmont Newnan Hospital. Mr. Moore was born in Jackson, Georgia on Nov. 28, 1935. He is preceded in death by his parents, Horace Moore and Louise O’Kelly Moore; son, Timothy Moore; sister, Martha Goens; brother, Larry Moore. Mr. Moore is a veteran of the United States National Guards, retired from Borden Dairy and a member of Rock Springs Church. Survivors include his children, Deborah Smith, Robin Massengale, Pamela West, Kathy Langford, Tammy Boen, Danny Moore; 12 grandchildren; 12 great-grandchildren; brothers and sisters, William Moore, Richard Moore, Ann Gilley, Floyd Moore. Visitation for Mr. Robert Franklin Moore will be on Tuesday, April 15, from 6 until 8 p.m. at Conner-Westbury Funeral Home. Funeral services will be conducted on Wednesday, April 16, at 2 p.m. in the chapel of Conner-Westbury Funeral Home. Dr. Benny Tate will officiate. Interment will follow in Griffin Memorial Gardens. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Lewy Body Dementia Association, 912 Killian Hill Rd., SW, Lilburn, GA 30047 in memory of Mr. Moore. Conner-Westbury Funeral Home, 1891 W. McIntosh Rd., Griffin is in charge of arrangements.
Week In Review »
  1. Thursday NAACP meeting cancelled; group meets tonight
  2. Ga. given 30 days to fix food stamp problems
  3. Habitat for Humanity hampered by gunfire, crime
  4. 10 Things to Know for Today
  5. Freeze Warning, gusty winds for Middle Georgia
  6. Governor signs sweeping tax-break law
  7. Northgate pulls off important sweep of Starr’s Mill
  8. Two-vehicle accident slows One Lane of Bullsboro Drive
  9. Obituary: Mr. Harold L. “Hal” Kidd Jr., 75, of Carrollton, Georgia, died Sunday, April 13, 2014. He was born in Newnan, Georgia, on June 2, 1938. His parents, Harold L. Kidd Sr. and Eunice Newman Kidd preceded him in death. In addition to his parents a brother Donald, age 15, preceded him in death. At age 18 Hal joined the National Guard reserve and served for 4 years. He began his accounting career at a local accounting firm in 1964. In 1968 he received his bachelor of business of administration in accounting from Georgia State College and worked as a certified public accountant. In 1975 he built a poultry farm and operated it for seven years. He received an award of commendation for outstanding hatching egg producer of Gold Kist in 1980. He was happiest on his motorcycles and flying as a private pilot. He served as secretary/treasurer of the Carrollton Lions Club. Hal also served as treasurer of the Carroll County Livestock Sale Barn, the Carroll County Baptist Association, and the West Georgia Two Cylinder Club. He was a member of Oak Grove Baptist Church where he served in various capacities. Hal retired from Warren Sewell Clothing Company of Bremen, Georgia in 2002 after 21 years. Survivors include his wife of 55 years, Sara Stipe Kidd; three children, Patricia K. Thomas of Acworth, Georgia, Julie Mohs and husband Geoff of Douglasville, Georgia, and John C. Kidd of Raleigh, North Carolina; grandchildren, Dean Phillips and wife Elizabeth, Jennifer Phillips, all of Acworth, Georgia, Jarrett Mohs of Douglasville, Georgia; one great grandson, Parker Evanoff of Acworth, Georgia; brother, Joe W. Kidd of Gainesville, Georgia; and a number of nieces and nephews. The family will receive friends at Almon Funeral Home on Wednesday evening from 6 until 8 p.m. Funeral service will be Thursday, April 17, at 11 a.m. at the chapel of Almon Funeral Home with Pastor Rob Vincent of Oak Grove Baptist Church officiating. Pallbearers will be Rod Stipe, Chuck Adams, Clifton Stephens, Geoff Mohs, Bob Mayer and Jason Kidd. Interment will be in Stripling Chapel Church Cemetery. Memorial contributions can be made to Oak Grove Baptist Church, 2829 Oak Grove Church Rd., Carrollton, GA 30117. Messages of condolences may be expressed to the family online at www.almonfuneralhome.com . Almon Funeral Home of Carrollton has charge of arrangements.
  10. Obituary: Mr. Robert Franklin Moore Mr. Robert Franklin Moore, age 78, of Griffin, GA, passed away on Monday, April 14, 2014, at Piedmont Newnan Hospital. Mr. Moore was born in Jackson, Georgia on Nov. 28, 1935. He is preceded in death by his parents, Horace Moore and Louise O’Kelly Moore; son, Timothy Moore; sister, Martha Goens; brother, Larry Moore. Mr. Moore is a veteran of the United States National Guards, retired from Borden Dairy and a member of Rock Springs Church. Survivors include his children, Deborah Smith, Robin Massengale, Pamela West, Kathy Langford, Tammy Boen, Danny Moore; 12 grandchildren; 12 great-grandchildren; brothers and sisters, William Moore, Richard Moore, Ann Gilley, Floyd Moore. Visitation for Mr. Robert Franklin Moore will be on Tuesday, April 15, from 6 until 8 p.m. at Conner-Westbury Funeral Home. Funeral services will be conducted on Wednesday, April 16, at 2 p.m. in the chapel of Conner-Westbury Funeral Home. Dr. Benny Tate will officiate. Interment will follow in Griffin Memorial Gardens. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Lewy Body Dementia Association, 912 Killian Hill Rd., SW, Lilburn, GA 30047 in memory of Mr. Moore. Conner-Westbury Funeral Home, 1891 W. McIntosh Rd., Griffin is in charge of arrangements.
Week In Review »

© 2011 The Newnan Times-Herald Inc., Newnan, Georgia. Any unauthorized use, copying or mirroring is prohibited.